


An Innocent Joke

by bashfulwalrus



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Angst, Based on a Tumblr Post, Bottom Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Cute, Funny, Gay, M/M, Oneshot, Sexual Frustration, Sexual Tension, Top Simon Snow, get a room, puns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-08
Updated: 2019-06-08
Packaged: 2020-04-12 14:42:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19134148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bashfulwalrus/pseuds/bashfulwalrus
Summary: Based on the Tumblr post:Baz, shirtless: "Hey have you seen my top?"Penny: "Yeah, Simon's in the other room."





	An Innocent Joke

Baz looked around Simon’s (and his too, by the looks of it) bedroom for his shirt, furrowing his brow. 

“Hey Penny.” He walked into the living room. “Have you seen my top?”

“Yeah, Simon’s in the other room,” Penny answered nonchalantly. 

Baz froze, praying to Merlin he hadn’t heard her right. If there was any blood in his body he was sure it was in his face. In front of him, Penny fought to keep a straight face, yet her book shook with laughter. “Right. Very funny, Penny,” he said in a pinched voice, turning around. 

Just his luck, Simon came out from the kitchen, mouth stuffed with scones. “What’s so funny?” he asked, crumbs blowing everywhere. 

Baz didn’t even try to hide his disgust. “Nothing, just Penny being a bloody numpty with her crude humor.”

“Wanna hear the joke?” came Penny’s voice from behind them. 

Simon let out an eager “yes” at the same time Baz let out a horrified “no.”

Simon squinted at Baz. “Why? What’s wrong?”

Penny cut him off. “Baz asked where his top was and I said you were in the other room.”

Time stopped and Baz could practically see the gears turning in Simon’s head. _Maybe, _Baz thought hopefully. _Maybe he wouldn't get the joke and they could all move o-___

____“Oh!” Simon burst out. “I- I get it now.” He grinned devilishly and sent Baz a look that made Baz’s stomach drop, made his knees nearly give out._ _ _ _

____“Right then.” Baz cleared his throat._ _ _ _

_____Riiiiiing. _Penny jumped. “It’s Micah.” She grabbed her phone and quickly excused herself to get up and head towards the door, but not before one last smug look over her shoulder. Baz rolled his eyes and huffed.__ _ _ _ _

______“So...” Simon was still giving him a smoldering stare. He stepped closer. “I’m your top, huh?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Baz felt his skin heat up. “If that’s what the kids call it these days.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“I like it,” Simon whispered, lifting his hand up to gently trace Baz’s jawline. “It fits.” He snorted. “No pun intended.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Baz groaned. “I’ve had enough of you guys.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Hey, hey, I’m sorry,” Simon was laughing, and the sound was so beautiful that Baz was trying not to smile back. “If you’d lighten up a bit, maybe you could appreciate these puns.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Maybe I’d appreciate them more if they weren’t so cheesy.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Cheesy?” Simon quirked an eyebrow. “Not all jokes can be wry humor and dark satire, you know.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“No, but the best ones are.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Simon was about to retort when the door popped open again. Penny gave them amused looks at their close proximity. “Get a room you guys.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Simon playfully stuck his tongue out at her and Baz sighed. But with the way Simon’s hand tightened imperceptibly around his waist, almost possessively, Baz knew they’d be doing just that._ _ _ _ _ _


End file.
